


The Impacts of Clothing on Team Building and The Socialization of Androids

by HerenorThereNearnorFar



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie), Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie) Spoilers, Dress Up, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-22
Updated: 2015-05-22
Packaged: 2018-03-31 16:55:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3985741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HerenorThereNearnorFar/pseuds/HerenorThereNearnorFar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wanda and Vision play dress up. That's pretty much it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Impacts of Clothing on Team Building and The Socialization of Androids

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by several discussions of robot gender I've seen and this absolutely canon picture of Vision in a polo shirt. (http://40.media.tumblr.com/c71c6dec42aaeaca3bbf1fedff13154a/tumblr_mkmon9cbjb1rsus6so1_500.jpg) As always, this could use more editing.

It wasn't the weirdest thing Maria Hill had walked in on during her time with the new Avengers team, not by a long shot. That dubious honor went to the two rookies smuggling in a squirrel and some paint, or maybe Sam Wilson's karaoke. It was certainly the most unexpected though.

Wanda's room wasn't the mess it had been a month previously but it still wasn't the most inviting place. The girl kept to herself, for the most part. Maria was only there to remind her to eat. There had been some concerns over Miss Maximoff's mental health and while they had mostly abated there was still a general check that she was feeding herself regularly.

Maria had been expecting a routine, _Please just go down to the cafeteria before people get worried_ before she clocked out. Not clothes all over Wanda's room and Wanda herself on the bed, looking thoughtfully at the Vision, who was standing in front of her wearing a long red dress with a flared skirt.

Vision noticed her first, giving her a polite nod and a gracious, "Agent Hill." He didn't sound particularly surprised. Wanda started a little more, but not by much, and she didn't move from her perch among the tangled, regulation white, sheets on her bed.

Maria decided this was probably one of those times when not reacting was the best thing she could do. She hadn't risen to her position by giving anything away and she wasn't going to start now.

"Vision. Miss Maximoff. It's nice to see you two bonding but you haven't been seen around the base all day. If you wouldn't mind putting in a few appearances before Captain Rogers starts fussing it would make my life much easier."

"I'm terribly sorry." Visions said, voice crisp and vaguely apologetic as always. "I just haven't had a lot of chances to experiment with human clothing and Wanda has been helping me. I do hope no one is concerned on our behalf."

Somehow between his general sweetness and the sudden guilt on Wanda's face Maria found herself softening, and that didn't happen easily. "No, neither of you are any trouble. I was just nearby and thought it would be good to check in." Truth be told she hadn't even noticed Vision was missing, it was generally accepted that he was weird and would occasionally wander off, plus he wasn't considered half the flight risk the Maximoff girl was. Maria cleared her throat. "And I'm sure everyone would be delighted to see you..." 'Playing dress up together' sounded derogatory and Maria searched desperately for an alternate turn of phrase. "Commiserating over fashion. It's a lovely dress."

She was actually impressed by the amount of clothing strewn around. She knew Pepper Potts had sent a wardrobe over, and Natasha had taken Wanda shopping a few times, but it was an sizeable collection nonetheless, especially for a woman who hadn't even been in the country for more than a few months.

Vision smiled fondly, and it was amazing that he could make vibranium laced pseudo-flesh look so soft. "I was reading about various traditions in the Balkans, so I could talk to Wanda and then we got involved in a discussion of traditional clothing, and then clothing, so she offered to let me try some of her garments on. But I don't think any of them suit my hips."

Wanda gave her closet a betrayed look. "I could have sworn I had some skirts that weren't so frilly."

Maria knew she was going to regret this for the rest of her life but if it makes the unstable witch and questionably loyal android happy, she didn’t care. "What you really need are some pencil skirts, and suit jackets. I have some in my room."

They really need to figure out how to weaponize the Vision's puppy dog eyes, she decides, looking back. But somehow it was Wanda's cautious smile that really did it. For all her sins, she had just lost her brother and was still visibly in her own quiet mourning. Months of training and desperate attempts to pull her out of her shell hadn't helped half as much as this seemed to be helping. Maria could use up a little of her free time on what Fury would have called, "personnel management", and Coulson would have called, "keeping your people non-murdery".

 

An hour later she's sitting on Wanda Maximoff's bed, with Wanda herself and Natasha Romanoff who had snuck into the room about ten minutes in because Natasha has some sort of radar for interesting things. Also, she's a little drunk, because Natasha brought a flask of something clear and sharp that is either vodka or super-vodka because it's ridiculously strong. The Vision is considering the latest offering, a long wrap dress that Romanoff had brought as her offering.

"I do like this." he said finally. "It's very robelike."

"Are you sure we can't do your makeup?" Natasha asked. "I think it will help round off the whole human experience."

"No." the Vision said, "Makeup looks terribly garish."

There's an offended silence between the three women before he adds. "If applied improperly, of course." And Maria isn't sure if that was a smooth save on his part, or there was just natural pause before the second part. Androids, so hard to read.

Natasha leans back and idly asks, "So you think I'd apply your makeup improperly?" and the silence returns. Their Black Widow isn't allowed to scare the new recruits anymore and she's taken to playing her usual tricks on colleagues, for what Maria assumes are the Natasha equivalent of kicks.

This time Vision actually does seem a little worried, there's unease in his voice as he says, "No, of course no, Agent Romanoff."

Maria takes another tiny sip of the overgrown moonshine as Natasha smirks. "So, since I can clearly properly apply makeup and you only like improperly applied makeup you'll let me do yours?"

Most of the junior agents would be nodding in silent terror right now but the Vision just shifts uncomfortably and says, "No, thank you. I must still respectfully decline."

Wanda moves to help him out of the latest dress and Maria has started to notice the way Wanda's eyes linger on his face and how Vision smiles at her. Good for them, but Maria really hopes that they never try to get married because she'd probably get stuck with the paperwork.

Vision isn't very conscious of his body and that he shrugs out of the dress easily. Natasha tosses a pair of jeans borrowed from Rhodey. (Who had only surrendered them upon learning what they were for, and even then insisted that they be returned in perfect condition.) to him.

"Denim might suit you a little better than silk." Natasha says decidedly.

Rhodey's jeans end up discarded in favor of Natasha's which somehow fit better and they're considering how Vision looks in one of Maria's ruffled blouses when Steve comes in.

"Why?" he asks and Natasha throws a scarf at him.

"It's the twenty first century Steve. Go be judgmental somewhere else." she declares and Maria considers confiscating the vodka. Natasha isn't anywhere near drunk but she's still more intoxicated then Maria's ever seen her, it's not like the Black Widow to lose control. Then again they all deserved a break.

"I'm not..." he sighs, "Look, I just don't think it's fair to be pushing Vision around. Let him make his own choices."

Vision looks up, "I appreciate your concern, Captain Rogers, but I assure you I was not at all coerced. Also I would like to take this chance to remind everyone that I'm an artificial intelligence powered by a cosmic entity in a body with only secondary sexual characteristics and don't technically have a gender."

"If you think I'm worried about the clothes, you clearly don't know Brooklyn." Steve says wryly. "Look, I just think we need to have more respect for the Vision's personal space, if he's fine, I'm fine. But Rhodey wants his clothes back."

"I have no complaints." Vision says, as Maria absently picks up Rhodey's jeans and a few of his shirts off the floor and hands them to Natasha, who balls them up and throws them at Steve.

Wanda smooths the blouse thoughtfully and says, "This would look much better as a..." she trails off and makes vague gestures around her throat before tracking down the word she's looking for, Maria really hopes she hasn't tried the vodka. "Polo shirt."

Several pairs of eyes turn to Captain America. Workplace stereotyping is terrible, but sometimes it simply can't be helped. 

The polo shirt looks fantastic and Vision really takes to it. They're going to have to have a talk with him about color choices though, Maria thinks a few days later. You can lead an android to fashion but you can't make him grasp subtlety. It really shouldn't have been a surprise; they were talking about someone who willingly wore a shiny yellow cape.


End file.
